If only I could...

If only I could,
If only there was a way,
Things I need to tell.

This usually isn't a normal blog, however, I feel I must make a normal blog post of sorts.

Mei-Ying, how could I ever compare. The last thing I think about before sleeping, the first thing I think about when I wake up. My thoughts may drift away from you at times, but only for as long as the activity endures. I simply cannot fathom how much happier you have made my life. You brought warmth, you brought love, you brought compassion, you brought safety, you brought support, you brought comfort, you brought so many things for which I am greatful. And to top it all off, you ask for so little in return.

While she may never read this, I had to put it in the open. I had to let the world know how much she meant to me, though words may only scratch the surface. No matter how large one's vocabulary, no matter how skillful one's literature, what I feel simply cannot be expressed in writing. Nor in any action which I myself could carry out. I simply continue to try, hoping that one day she may realise just how much she means to me.

You lack the self esteem of most, however, you are also far greater than most. Quite strange to be truthful, though I know you've been through a lot. Yet you stay strong, and strive for happiness through other people, caring for yourself only at neccesary times. This forms another part of you that I truly love. Uncompromising selflessness. It's so persistent, and so insanely beautiful in it's existance, makes me truly happy thinking about all that you give up for another's happiness. You bring out the best in me kid, please don't ever stop.

You're there for me when I need it, and then again you're there for me when I don't. Your support provides me with such insane feelings of admiration and adoration; you carry me through tough times with your good will and kind words. Please, let me attempt to return the favour. Though I have never been terribly good at comforting, help me learn, so that I may return that which you so freely and willingly give to me. I feel so obliged to be there for you at every moment that I can, yet you do not let me get close, for you feel your issues too petty. Share with me your burdens, as you allow me to share mine. Bring yourself closer to me, as I feel myself being drawn closer to you. Open your heart, and let me share the warmth.

You mourn over your slight imperfections, while us mere mortals admire your complete beauty, that is, your outter and inner refinement. You become downcast when you think of how much you care, when you know you shouldn't. Simply put my dear, don't. Your thoughtfulness and tenderness is appreciated by all, don't stop being you. Do not be ashamed of the person that you are, your effervescence brings about smiles, it brings about joy, it creates a feeling of content. Your presence warms a room, your good will melts hearts, your friendliness cures hurt. You take hate and return love, you take grief and you return comfort. Perfection is impossible, yet they say nothing is impossible. To me my dear, perfection comes in the form of you.

Mei my dear, my dearest of dears, how could I ever compare. You are my sunshine, you are my rainbow, you are my green grass, you are my brighter pasture, you are my tulip, you are my addiction. So to you I say this; I love you, yet do not let that be enough. Please, shape me into what you deserve me to be.